D’oh! No Homer Simpson in Texas prisons

Published Jan 17, 2018 at 4:00pm

The Texas Department of Corrections apparently takes its prisoners’ literature choices very seriously. More than 10,000 books are banned from the state’s prisons, The Dallas Morning News reports. Among the banned books are subversive titles such as “Where’s Waldo? Santa Spectacular,” “A Christmas Manger” and “Homer Simpson’s Little Book of Laziness.”

Not surprisingly, “Cool Hand Luke,” about a habitual prison escapee, is not allowed. A little more curious is the banning of Alice Walker’s Pulitzer Prize-winning novel, “The Color Purple,” and “Monty Python’s Big Red Book.”

A total of 248,281 books have been approved for prisoners’ reading pleasure, including Adolf Hitler’s “Mein Kampf” and two books by former Ku Klux Klan Grand Wizard David Duke. But prisoners apparently must be protected from the evils of “A Daily Dose of Torah Rabbinic Festivals.”

It’s OK for inmates to read “Satan’s Sorcery Volume 1,” but “Earth Magic: A Book of Shadows for Positive Witches” is a definite no-no. If you want to make sense of this list, talk to the warden.